i haven't slept in what seems like a century;

Voice Post

2009-06-14T18:38:10Z

offensive @ 2009-06-13T09:16:00

2009-06-13T13:18:32Z

The hell?

Jesus christ I just get up for a normal day of having to watch my sister's kids, and all hell breaks loose

i'm holding down the house right now with a shotgun and keeping the two brats away from the windows while my brother in law is who the fuck KNOWS where and my sister attempting to go get supplies.

I've gotta wake Av up soon I can't cover all the windows myself

Voice Post

2009-06-12T17:06:32Z

offensive @ 2009-04-29T13:27:00

2009-04-29T17:29:36Z

..okay sorry for the double post guys but I need to do this really quick. This post is public for the sake of the people who have friend-of'd me.

THIS IS A LINK TO MY FRIENDS ONLY POST

IF YOU DO NOT COMMENT HERE, AND EXPLAIN WHY YOU ARE FRIENDING ME, RANDOM PEOPLE, I WILL NOT FRIEND YOU BACK IF I DO NOT RECOGNIZE YOUR JOURNAL NAME.

PLEASE DO THIS. OR DEFRIEND ME. BECAUSE IT IS IRRITATING HAVING PEOPLE I DON'T KNOW TRYING TO WATCH MY JOURNAL.

offensive @ 2009-03-21T11:01:00

2009-03-21T15:23:36Z

stole from deconcentrate because I just woke up, have nothing better to do, and it looks kinda lulzy.

ALL RIGHT. For this meme, choose one character of yours and one character of mine - and then I will write out how they hook up, settle into a long term relationship and/or marriage, and describe their firstborn child/children. Yes, really. No, I didn't make this one up myself. You know you want it.

Characters of mine I'll write for this:

Rebecca Chambers clevermedic
Claire Redfield redfield
Kate Bishop takingtheshot
Penny apennysaved
Heather Mason godless
Sheva Alomar fightingchance
Sam Winchester devilsdrawnear or sceneswelost (specify plz as they're from two different canon points. one is way more effed up than the other.)
Rose Tyler lovedthemost
Hannibal King repenting
Zhen Lei ladysodivine
Buffy Summers classyslayer or slayingdemons
Ashley Graham annoyingblonde
Rachel Grey(Summers) mistakenflight or markedphoenix
Claire Bennet hardertokill
Helena Kyle feelthenight
Zidane Tribal virtuousthief
Kouzuki Kallen revolutionizing
Molly Mahoney mahoney
Kara Zor-El maidofmight
Link feralhero
Mia Fey spiritdefense
Oliver Malcolm falseregret or seun
Victoria Reynolds papermagic or papergirl
Valentina Tarasova wirebreathing, inthismachine, or tapinthecode
Leila Evans upwardstruggle or liquifying
Haruka Ishida burstlight or shestillshines
Jane Brown nohonesty or outranthem
Yuna rekindledfaith (or any other incarnation you remember)
Susan Bones strong_bones or undermybones

...okay I think that's enough. If there's someone I play that's not on there that you REALLYREALLY wanna harass, go for it although idk if I'll be able to muster a muse for some of my real oldies.

stolen from everyone and their mom at this point.

2009-03-02T23:27:55Z

Give me a character I play and a question/topic about them and I will answer according to my own personal canon. This can range from their birthday, favorite color or even their earliest memory up to what they had last night for dinner.

specifically my active characters in non-Dressing Room games atm are limited to DC although I'm...going to be expanding that sooner or later. uh.

so

Rebecca Chambers clevermedic
Heather/Cheryl Mason godless
Claire Redfield redfield
River Tam theluckybird
Penny apennysaved

Anyone else just take a look at primavista~ click the character lists tag and that's pretty much everyone.

offensive @ 2009-01-01T22:06:00

2009-01-02T03:53:52Z

Okay, so it's been a while, and since Kate's reared her ugly head again to harass me, and there are new people on my flist, AND I managed to hunt down my full story I'd written up, here is the unabridged version of Kate Being A Fucking Psycho At Varis For The Past Three Fucking Years.

I was running a game called worldbeyond, starting in the beginning of the summer of 2005, and it died around Christmas. This was the first time I'd ever played Claire Redfield in a Livejournal setting (I played her a few times in forum-based games, back before I fell out of the fandom for a few years) and that was nodamsel

Due to this, Rain somehow found me, and Instant Messaged me. I don't have the original log, but I remember her complimenting the crap out of me, buttering me up, saying it was nice to see a Claire that was actually IC, blah blah blah (Which is crap, since she's never played the games she'd have no idea.) anyway, this was when she asked me to mod her community with her The original post about that in my journal is here.

Note how pure and innocent I was. This was on October 30th.

And then to_the_end_rp existed. She jumped into it IMMEDIATELY. I am used to games waiting to garner a few more players before starting, but she wanted it going RIGHT THE FUCK AWAY, so...it went. And Leonmun, and all the other muns, and I all just sort of went along with it.

about a day or so after the game started, we had our first Incident. Apparently there was an issue with the Alice, she was kicked out and replaced, without my knowledge or consent. I was obviously annoyed, but Rain spun it so it sounded like it was the Alice's fault.

Now, knowing her history, that is something I doubt.

Then, there was a brief period of second-alice, but she didn't post at all, and was tossed in favor of third Alice, who was willing to do the Alice/Rain crap, and was thus hung on to, despite never being online except for weekends, which obviously annoyed Rain, and she complained FREQUENTLY.

All the while, Kacee, Lins, Ephe, and I are trying to create some semblance of a good game. We've got a bit of a plot going on, which is promptly tossed up due to a misunderstanding between the girl who picked up Sherry and Rain and myself, and she ended up being kicked out because she was messing up OUR plot, and while it was a lame way of handling it, most Claire muns know, Sherry and Claire need to have a certain dynamic, and if the Sherry mun is more concerned with trying to convince the Weskermun that Wesker raped Sherry, that's sort of an issue.

Now, I personally think we could've handled it better, but what's past is past.

anyway, after this we brought in a new Sherry, and went about trying to write around what the old Sherrymun did (Because at this point her plot was stuck in canon, Claire and Leon had reacted, we had to go through with it) and the game was sort of very slowtiming at this point.

This was.. in the beginning of December. The game ran for a month.

A week into December I got the idea for a LOST game (differentpaths) I knew at this point Rain didn't bother reading my journal unless she personally wanted something from me, and figured I'd be safe if I pimped it on my journal. (At this point, I was starting to feel uncomfortable talking to her, too. She IM'd me all the time, bitched about everything, and tried to make me feel like shit along with her.)

Well, she found out about it, and was mad I hadn't told her directly. I brushed it off as spacing out and she said she wanted Ana-Lucia. I told her she had to audition, just like everyone else (I knew she hated writing Applications, I figured if I put a complicated application in, it'd scare her off. Plus, there was a delay into after Christmas. I was right, and that did scare her off.) and she said she'd audition AFTER Christmas, when the game was about to start.

Well, surprise surprise, someone else applied for Ana-Lucia. and the application was good.

So I accepted her into the game.

And then I left for a weekend with my Sister, because we couldn't all do Christmas together, since she had a new baby and they couldn't really get away for Christmas proper.

When I got back, I was greeted with this on one of my voice posts I made while driving to and from my sister's

ROTFL. There's a guy walking a goat? Holy fuck. DA DA DA DA DA. We need to talk, I feel like I might have fucked... up... everything. So I miss you. And yeah. -hearts- (Disregard the comment about a goat, I did make mention about a guy walking a goat in the voice post. Maine is a weird place.)

so, I signed onto AIM, and was promptly invited into the chatroom my friends and I usually chatter in, and Leonmun and Sherrymun promptly warned me to not talk to Rain.

Well, too late, she'd already IM'd me by the time they warned me. the following conversation was a fantastic barrage of passive-aggressive insults, bitching, and telling me to disreguard everything that Kacee and Jewels told me.

Well, considering I've known Kacee and Jewels going on three years, and I've known Rain all of a month and a few days?

Obviously, I'm going to trust my friends more than someone who insults me, then turns around and apologizes.

This is the AIM chatlog between Jewels and Rain, before I came back.
(Note that this happens on the day that I LEFT, and I'd been on the night before until two am.)

8D

So.

After all that, she basically CLOSED TTE while I was gone, and yeah. then she started harassing me, trying to get me to show her the application for Ana-Lucia to my game. Obviously I knew she'd pick it apart, try to convince me that she was the better Ana, blah blah blah.

So I signed off of my old SN, and never signed back on, switching to a new f-locked SN.

I stayed like that until January, and Leon's mun and I missed some of our interactions in to_the_end_rp. So we decided to go with an idea we'd originally been trying to hash out in TTE, but Rain had been more concerned with sex than plot, so she didn't really have the DRIVE to go for it.

that was when thelastescape was born, and I made a stupid mistake of demodding Rain from to_the_end_rp when I was creating it. She got the maintainer removal notifications and flipped her shit.

A post showed up on my Friends Only post, asking what the fuck was going on, so I blocked her username.

Then there was a barrage assault, five different usernames, all banned, emails, pestering people who weren't even INVOLVED in the game over AIM (My Sawyer player from differentpaths, and so on) and threatening Text Messages, via LJ's Texting feature. (basically one said 'you want to play this fucking game with me? I will make your life a living hell.) All the while Jillmun at CW (This was before CW was created) was telling me to keep documentation, and to consider filing a restraining order.

She also went around posting this to as many people as were watching TLE, plus in her own journal. Which is a hoot, since she stole her RP idea from Vero. Who played Steve in TLE.

And the idea for TLE was something Kacee and I had come up with in the first place, and only vaguely mentioned a few times while chatting with her.

This went on for a day and a half, before I signed onto my old SN, and managed to placate her. I figured everything would be fine, and I signed onto that SN semi-regularly for the next two days, before she forgot about me again and I just stopped bothering signing onto it.

things were quiet for quite a while, TLE ended up dying, CW started up, so on, so forth.

then as we started picking up popularity in canonwars, and we got ourselves a few movieverse characters...

Rain popped up on the journal of one of the mods. Trying to buddy up, be all peacey-nice. Exactly a day after I'd told one of the other mods to be careful and watch for applications from her, because it's the type of game she likes. Lack of rules about being dead, and all.

This is the result.

And this is us sort of LOLing about it

So, she never contacted me directly during that, but about a week after I got a comment on my Fonly post, asking me to Delete TTE.

Which I did, since I really didn't care at that point. I later un-deleted it since I wanted something off the comm, and decided that leaving it up would be a big fuck you to her. I'm sort of tempted to go in and do some editing to the userinfo.

Things went on peacefully for a while, and we were all happy in the land of canonwars and tripletriad and so on and so forth.

then about a month ago I got an email from her after returning from a visit to my sister's yet again (Wtf. what is it with this chick and going crazy while I'm visiting my SISTER?) saying that we needed to talk, and wanting to know when I'd be on AIM.

I obviously just deleted it, and she probably forgot she'd even sent it.

and things continued to be quiet, however I heard about things, and there was a MASSIVE post about her on bad_rpers_suck, which I was heavily involved in. that post is here. This resulted in the creation of rainbowsblow, which was a comm meant to collect everyone who had been tormented by this chick together so we could hash it out and get HEALING TO BEGIN. A day after this she IM'd me (Obviously too huge of a coincidence, but she was acting like she had NO IDEA ZOMG SKANDALLLL that people had posted in BRPS about her. Three times. Four now.)

She was very sugar fake nice to me and wanted to be friends, and it was pretty ridicioulous. I've got the log somewhere I'll upload it if I can find it.

So, after that she didn't contact me at all, however about a week or so later rainbowsblow was suspended, and I now have a permanent black mark on my record thanks to this bitch! I had planned on disputing it but I figured LJ wouldn't care, so.

After this, I did my damnedest to move on. And it was quiet, for the most part, although she did come out of the woodwork again, after I'd joined thisisarea42.

I was playing Kate Austen (trappedwings) there, and shortly after RE: Extinction was released on DVD I got bored and crazy and decided to try my hand at movie!verse Claire (brandmysoul)

Very shortly after this, we got ourselves an Ana-Lucia, who called herself Liliah, and who promptly imed me before even joining the game, telling me her friend was picking up Alice etc etc.

I IMMEDIATELY was wary and called for Vero to come save me which she did. For anyone who does not understand the depth of my affection for postman, let me say this now. She saves my shit. A lot. She is one of the best people I know :( And a good thing that came out of Kate's batfuck.

So, I figured I'd try and wait it out, see what she did. Well, she starts attacking my character (Kate, not Claire) in chat, saying how Ana is going to bitchslap Kate if Kate gets all "whiny."

For anyone who has seen Lost, you know Kate is anything but whiny. I asked her to clarify, and she said "oooh jack, ooh sawyer i can't pick wah wah wah" or something to that effect. Which pretty much hacked me RIGHT off. Assuming shit about someone else's character is not cool, okay. She also made a bunch of other really creepy comments towards me, and I just stopped going into chat. And then I dropped out of the game altogether, one because I was growing out of the crack, and two because she was there.

Things were quiet for another few months, and stupid me, I decided to go venture forth into a Resident Evil game where I didn't know people again. I figured I'd be safe on a game with a forum outside of LJ, right?

oh how wrong I was.

So the game actually closed pretty quickly after that, and she didn't message me or anything after that, which I was glad for.

Another few months go by, to the beginning of this month. she found my journal and comments on it, inviting me to join a game she'd created.

I ignore this, the post may actually be deleted by now I didn't check.

she leaves me alone all this month AND THEEEEEN

DEGENERATION COMES OUT!

AND SHE IMED ME!

And then she harassed a lot of people I know in the RE circle, yzak included, and posted twice with her lame-ass characters in thedressinglabs which makes me sad since now I'm afraid to post there. Which I had actually been considering sometime in the immediate future.

and then she reserved Angela at Daisychain.

And while it seems like the Degeneration game she wanted to make didn't hash out right she must have found some other unsuspecting prey, because she's got another project.

Aaaaaaand now we are caught up. Happy New Year, Varis! May it be full of batshit every few months like the past three years have been! 8D

yup so that's the whole thing. for me, anyway. everyone has their own stories. This one's mine. Now I'm going to go hide.

offensive @ 2008-11-22T15:14:00

2008-11-22T20:25:03Z

okay so Ami asked for the recipe, and so, here it is. IDK how well it'll turn out since I've been the only person in the family to ever recreate the bread to taste exactly like my mother's, but if you follow my instructions correctly you should be fine.

Sharon's Pumpkin Bread

4 eggs
2 cups sugar
1 cup vegetable oil
1 can One Pie pumpkin (ALWAYS USE THE ONE PIE. THE LIBBY'S AND ALL OTHER BRANDS TASTE WRONG)
2 cups flour
1/2 tsp. salt
2 tsp. baking soda
2 tsp. cinnamon

Beat the eggs. Add sugar and vegetable oil, mix well with hand mixer. sift dry ingredients (flour, salt, salt, baking soda, cinnamon. make sure the cinnamon is looking well-distributed throughout the mix) add dry ingredients to mix, a little at a time while mixing with the mixer. I like to fold the batter around the flour to try and cut down on the spray. Add pumpkin and blend well. The color you should get should be just slightly orange. if it's too orange or too tan you're doin it wrong.

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit. put bread into a greased/floured pan, and bake for 45 minutes. After 45 minutes check it with a knife, if it still comes out gooey, keep baking in five minute intervals until it comes out clean. The bread when it's done should be a really nice orange-brown color.

I'd include pictures but I'm lazy. The end result though should be a really moist fluffy bread which is om nom nom good. My stepmom likes to eat it with cream cheese, and you can also make a cream cheese frosting with it which tastes good, too.

offensive @ 2008-11-01T01:37:00

2008-11-01T05:45:40Z

okay costume!

(also I ended up coming home. stupid contacts were hurting my eyes and I was getting tired besides. I HAVE OBVIOUSLY SOBERED UP.)

mandatory "before" image.

and the after.

me and geri. nicole took a bad pic, so it's impossible to see her freaky cat-eyes, but uh, yeah. she's an rpd cop that's slightly mutated 8D

group picture. and the only one that i got a shot of my whole costume.

pics i took for the sake of it when i got home. posing is fun

obligatory "art pose" i'd find the image that's posed like this for the nurse but i am lazy

ohhh idk.

closeup 1. that hat? that is a paper hat i made at the last minute. it was a pain in the ass to keep on and if i ever wear this costume to a con or something i'm going to take the time to make a real hat.

closeup 2. yay me

Yeah so I had fun. up until the end when I got kind of bored, but that's what happens. I somehow got sandwiched in between the two most boring people at the party so yeah. XD

I got a lot of compliments on my costume, so that was great. Huge ego boost when people were all like "BEST COSTUME I'VE EVER SEEN" and a few people actually recognized I was a nurse from Silent Hill, so that was cool.

I actually had a lot of fun wearing it. Even if I've got splochy marks on my skin and my pores are going to be traumatized for the next few days.

offensive @ 2008-10-10T20:50:00

2008-10-11T00:57:28Z

So I forgot to post these the other day, but I just remembered now thanks to discussing the fact that in the event of demon uprising/zombies, me and GG are fucked, respectively.

Anyway for those of you who don't know, I live in Maine. Maine is also the alleged (alleged in they all BUT say it) location of Silent Hill.

Granted that SH is made by Japanese dudes who have likely never been to Maine, but they still manage to get the feeling of the architecture and geographical look down. As I will demonstrate with these pictures I took on a very foggy commute to work! :D Sometime I'll get better shots around town when it's foggy.

an apartment complex. Fairly mundane.

some church. on a hill.

this is the entrance to the old part of the hospital my stepmom works at. I'd get a picture of the Brookhaven Hospital to compare and contrast but I can't actually FIND one. But um, yeah. IT LOOKS VERY SIMILAR. :)

going down the hill past the hospital.

railroad tracks!

creepy abandoned (haunted) water mill

street going up to the insane asylum, if I remember correctly.

street sign. Spot the shoop, win a prize 8D

*is a loser.*

offensive @ 2008-07-14T21:31:00

2008-07-15T01:35:08Z

Alison started it, Kitty fed the fire, etc etc. I feel like I've had a crappy enough month to warrant this though, dammit.

Do you ever want to make an entry that says "LOVE ME, I FEEL LIKE CRAP," but that's kind of not a good thing to do because it's attention whoring?

... Well. I don't care right now.

LOVE ME GUYS. I will do my best to love you in return. I WILL NOT TELL YOU HOW I PLAN TO DO THIS, but I think it would be nice for everyone to have some love right now. You can even take this as a MEME and go attention whore in your own journals. Switch it up, make it a thing where people give you new icons, or write you fic, or bring their RP characters in to be obnoxious. WHATEVER MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER.

offensive @ 2008-06-13T09:52:00

2008-06-13T14:06:18Z

I don't think I got any sleep last night. It's fucking hard to, with all that moaning and groaning going on. My cat's been freaking out, and I can't blame her. She's never experienced something like this before.

We're lucky after the last invasion we kept a tool closet, it's been pretty effective what we've been doing to keep them out, but it doesn't seem like it's going to hold up much longer.

I just got a text from my sister. I guess the zombies haven't gotten to her neighborhood yet. I'm going to see if I can get down there. It's gotta be safer than here. My car's small, maybe I'll be able to squeeze past any abandoned cars on the interstate.

Wish me luck, I'll keep you guys posted. If the zombies don't get me.

(the zombies are coming.)

Writer's Block: Top Five Video Games

2007-11-16T17:25:33Z

What's on your Top 5 video games list?

View 500 Answers

1; Resident Evil 2
2; Final Fantasy X
3; Okami
4; The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess
5; Resident Evil 4/Code:Veronica

Resident Evil 2; This has been, and probably always will be, my favorite Resident Evil game. It's not as scary as it used to be to me, what with the old graphics and sometimes hilarious voice acting, but things still manage to jump me, even though I know the game by heart. The story also remains very important and interesting to me, all these years and sequels later.

Final Fantasy X; This game has been my favorite Final Fantasy since I played it, which is sad since IX used to hold that spot, but X just had so many elements that I was completely drawn to. The beautiful world plagued by "sin" the religious references, the diverse cast of characters, and the story was just so heartbreaking. I loved it, and I still can't listen to the music that plays during the ending without crying.

Okami; Granted I still haven't finished this game, but I think that it took a kind of overused story and added an amazingly fresh twist to it. It's a blast to "draw" on things, and the wolf is surprisingly capable in battle, which I loved. Not to mention the game itself is absolutely breathtaking in scenery and effect.

The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess; Yes, all of the Zelda games are the same thing, over and over, but I felt like TP added enough fresh new elements to really sort of give a new breath to the series. Midna for one thing, was an incredible touch, and the graphics were quite beautiful. The wolf link thing was also new, and the much more interactive horseback, as well as more three-dimensional backdrop characters.

Resident Evil 4/Code:Veronica; These two games tie for me, because they're both sequels for my favorite characters, and they're both such good games. Granted, 4 IS a little bit better than CV, but not enough to matter in my book. The stories are both important, in some way, and while not completely connected, it's still my Resident Evil love. Claire is finally reunited with her brother in CV, Leon has it confirmed for him that Ada is in fact alive. There's also annoying helper characters that you have to play as at some point. Although Steve is vastly more useful than Ashley. Because he has guns.

offensive @ 2007-07-01T01:37:00

2007-07-01T05:40:22Z

Okay well since sleep is not happening right now because SMELL OF EW OUTSIDE WON'T GO AWAY...

ASK MY CHARACTERS ANYTHING

comment to this entry with questions for any of my RP characters list there. Go nuts, ask whatever, and characters I've played in the past that aren't there count too.

offensive @ 2007-06-13T23:47:00

2007-06-14T03:52:22Z

Neighbor's dogs are barking.

Loooooooks like we're gearing up for another wave. Seems like downtown has been gutted, god knows how the electricity's still on. the zombies are starting to head out here, to the outskirts, but there's a lot of fortification down the street, not to mention huge fucking hill.

Still, the stronghold is prepped, just in case, and it's entirely likely that we may have to flee.

Sounds like the Rescue choppers are taking off.

Figures that they decide to get the people who are already frigging sick out before getting the healthy people out.

Whatever.

Also, for those of you who seem to think this is all an unfunny joke? SCREW YOU, PEOPLE DIE FROM ZOMBIES EVERY DAY. WE ARE FACING THE MOTHERFUCKING APOCALYPSE. MY FRIENDS, ARE DYING.

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH IT'S GOING TO SUCK IN A YEAR WHEN THERE ARE DEAD BODIES EVERYWHERE AND NO TOILET PAPER?

offensive @ 2007-06-13T21:08:00

2007-06-14T01:10:21Z

Okay so the zombies are dead, and the house is barred off, for now.

Dad said that this book was a stupid investment, but it's getting us through the motherfucking apocalypse.

Cable and Internet were restored by clever trick I invented using some gum and a satellite dish from the garage.

Cat is safely indoors, and uninfected.

(PSA for the uneducated. I am a big fat liar who loves zombies. And my Flist.)

offensive @ 2007-03-19T14:24:00

2007-03-19T18:27:43Z

baaa. snagged from everyone and your mom.

Most of you on my flist don't really know my original characters personally. Small wonder, I don't really write much for them beyond RPing, though I really should. To remedy this to some small degree and give you a small introduction to the madness, I propose this:

Give me a bit of inspiration. A picture, a poem, a summary of a story, some words you'd like it themed on, etc. I'll write for the character you specify or the character I want to write for. It doesn't matter. No word limit, no nothing. I'll also include a bit of backstory if it's needed, or even link you to their 20 facts post, if they have one.

All my characters are listed here, I'd rather my originals got the prompts, but you're free to attack my fandom characters too, if you wish. XD

EDIT; made it public because I'm a whore for comments.

resolutionremix

James Weyde Malcolm	sixfloorsdown	[one+two]
Kenneth Wong	failthesetrials	[one+two+three]
Leila Evans	upwardstruggle	[one+two+three]
Haruka Ishida	burstlight	[one+two+three+four]
Amaryllis Reynolds	whileshesings	[one]
Jane Brown	nohonesty	[one+two+three]
Ariela Sophia Belini	littledefects	[one+two+three]

worldresolution

Oliver Malcolm	seun	[one+two]
Victoria Reynolds	papermagic	[one+two+three]
Ba Lin Yao	bousek	[one]
Wynnifred Meadows	soulsastray	[one

don't tell me what to think 'cause i don't care this time;

2006-12-01T21:50:28Z

All right. This has gone on long enough. This is going to be the first actual post I make about the Figgy Situation, and it's going to be the last. (I'm sorry Elly, this is the only one I promise)

My name is Victoria. I'm twenty years old. I have one year at a shitty college where I failed out and never bothered going back because I'm afraid of failure, I'm afraid of trying, I have no ambition, and various other things. I have a piss poor job at Target as a Cashier, and I hate it, but I'm too lazy to do anything about it. I live in the attic of my parents' house, and I have no intentions of moving out anytime soon, despite what I say.

These things are all the boring, ugly truth about me. Because I am an honest person. I don't feel the need to lie to gain friends, because if you like me based on lies or how many stupid fucking posts in a day I can post, or because of my heinous graphics, or because of any number of other petty things, I've got no business associating with you. You will like me for the kind of person I am. Honest, loyal, and a little bit hot-headed (and when I say a little, I mean a lot.)

And I can tell you right now, that it's unlikely there is anyone on the Internet, outside of lheena who was closer to Figgy than I was.

And I am never forgiving her for what she did.

Which is not lying about her fucking PhD, as some of you think that's all she did, and no, if that were it? She doesn't deserve to be punished so brutally as she is. But she is not the good person you all think she is. She is a liar, and she's one of the most manipulative people I've ever known, despite her constant joking claims of her being innocent.

I have known Figgy for five years. From the beginning, she was one of the nicest people I'd known. She was warm, and friendly, and fuzzy, and awesome to me when I was a scared newbie in the big new world of Chatroom Roleplaying. She welcomed me with open arms, and we were friends ever since. That was back when Laurie, Wren, Dawn, Spam, Myf, Joie, Alex, everyone were still together, we were awesome, and powerful in our awesome.

It was around then that her PhD was called into question the first time. She has later amended the story to say that she hadn't gotten her PhD until a little after Magic and Muggles closed, to add in something about a psych ward visit (which I can't confirm or deny, although I've got my doubts about it) to add a little bit of spice to her life. To appeal to those of us who have suffered mental conditions, to gain good graces with fellow 'crazies.'

I didn't realize for a long time I was being constantly lied to, because Figgy has always told her lies honestly, like she believed them herself. And who knows, maybe she does. Maybe she's lied about so many things, so often, she actually believes that Rollins isn't her actual last name, that she spent time in a psychiatric ward, that she's a PhD, that she's working at the University of Washington.

Everything I listed there is not true, by the way.

How can I judge her so harshly? Because I knew her. Like I said, no one was closer to her than I was. I defended her when no one else wanted to and people called her out on being stupid, or annoying, or a liar. I pointed to the people who believed and called them friends, and I stuck by Figgy because she was mine. Because I talked to her all the time, because she said how she was always honest and true with me, because she said I was her best friend.

I lived in denial for years. Nothing was every Figgy's fault, although she cried and sobbed, blaming herself for things that happened in role-playing games and beyond. I constantly assured her that it wasn't her fault, it was the other person's fault. Figgy was a good person. Figgy was my friend.

Looking back now, after all that's happened, after she's finally admitted to just one of her many lies, I realize that's not the case. She did things that no sane person would do. She twisted stories to fit her needs, she mislead people into thinking it wasn't her fault.

She lied to so many of you, and you're still standing by her.

How can I know this?

I had her email password, throughout most of it. After I started modding canonwars with her, I checked it a little more often. Whenever something went wrong, whenever she thought that someone was going to blame her for something, she would quickly email everyone involved, telling each person a different story, begging forgiveness, saying the other mods were making her be mean.

She would forward official, valid complaints that players had to the parties that were being complained about, without asking the other mods, without consulting us. She would try to break up fights on her own, but she only caused more by blaming the person who she felt like would stick by her and the person who had finally had enough of her shit she would turn to, crying, saying it wasn't her fault.

I don't know how many times she called me, sobbing because she did that one too many times, and the person who had been threatening to leave for ages finally did. She quit and then changed her mind in so many of our games, so many times, I can't even remember each individual occurrence.

She would talk shit about people behind their backs, over the phone, and in email, before promptly emailing the person she was talking shit about and being nice.

I defended her to people that called her stupid, unreliable, a bitch, a liar.

She never once defended me from the people who insulted me. She changed the subject. Because she couldn't stand confrontation that might lose her a friend, never mind that she lost the people who were actually standing by her out of love for her as a person the second she lied.

Me. Amanda. Spam. There are more, but Amanda and Spam are the only ones who I know who have made posts about this, who have met her in real life, who are deeply hurting because she lied to them both. She knew Spam longer than she knew me, and Spam was one of her closest friends for a very long time. Figgy lied even then about her PhD.

We were stupid to believe the things she lied about, but when you love someone, when you think they've got a sparkling personality, you become unwilling to see the truth. You ignore it, until it slaps you in the face so hard you want to vomit.

That's what happened.

Suspicion building up until Figgy finally couldn't take the lies. She was finally facing them, and she snapped because she couldn't take them anymore. Because people who she had lied to over the phone and online and face-to-face so many times about little things, about big things, about everything were being understanding when she "entered the 12-step program" when she started seeking forgiveness for things that people didn't realize they were forgiving her for. She wasn't asking forgiveness for the small things she'd done and then covered up best she could with crying and promises of never doing it again, and getting better. She was seeking forgiveness for the lies she'd told.

And she isn't getting it. Not now, not ever. She is honest-to-god sick, yes. But she's waited too long, let it fester, take hold of her, poison her and her friends. I'd be surprised if any one of her old friends talked to her again.

Not that it matters, she's got new friends who are all a-okay with her lies and don't think it's a big deal because she's a nice person. People who think if they love her enough she'll come back and everything will be normal and she'll keep making her stupid Fandom Survivor posts, and her posts about happy fuzzies and her occasional emo posts so that she can get pats on her back and her ego inflated.

This isn't the end of it. I'd like to think that Figgy has gone and actually checked herself into a psych ward now, that she's gone to get some actual help for her obvious mental condition. She lied about having one, and well, it's the truth.

Figgy is sick. She needs help. Not a one of you on the Internet can give her that help, so stop acting like you can. If she comes back, acting like she's okay again, and everything is normal again, I urge all of you who want to support her to tell her to go to a mental institution, to GET help. Despite all the bullshit she's pulled, I want her to get better. Because despite the lies, she was still my friend. And I'm loyal to a fault.

I want her to get help. I want her to get her life in order. I want her to become a human being. But I stopped believing her lies long ago. And I stopped being her friend the moment she deleted her journal. Because she wouldn't have deleted it if Amanda hadn't made that post.

Because she would've let everyone gloss it over for her. Make her feel good about her lies. Because she was admitting to two of them.

Yes, two big lies.

But admitting to two doesn't change the fact that she lied about so much more than that. That she hurt people with her lies, that she was only ever looking out for herself, and for her gigantic fucking statistics.

Now. Go right ahead and flame me. Defriend me over this if you want to. But don't think it's going to effect me, because I know the people who are my friends?

You're going to stick around at the end of the day, and you're going to give me the truth like I need it.

I am a leaf on the wind, watch me fall over;

2006-06-29T17:08:58Z

rpg_hiring!

Because it rly needed to be done. Plz to be pimping it a lot, since I really have no idea how else to get word out about it. xD

I am a leaf on the wind, watch me be a retard;

2006-06-22T01:11:59Z

okay so.

Random things Varis has taken in upon playing the first twenty minutes of RE2 over again:

- It's funny when you shoot zombies close-range with the shotgun and their top half falls off.
- Lickers still scare the crap out of me the first time you see it crawling past the window
- Leon is retarded
- Leon is not polite and concerned about zombies hearing him clunking up stairs like they clearly are in RE1 (the original, not REmake)
- This explains why in RE4 he kicks down doors and jumps out windows.
- Leon attempts to feel Claire up at least three times while telling her they need to split up, look for survivors, and get the fuck outta Raccoon.
- Wesker is marketing Teenage Rebecca porn to try and lure more hapless rookies into the RPD.
- This explains how Leon and Kevin both got in.

More developments as they occur!

I am a leaf on the wind, watch how i soar;

2006-06-06T17:13:13Z

R.I.P.
Sephiroth
2004-2006

I am a leaf on the wind, watch me baa;

2006-05-08T23:47:30Z

Okay, so I haven't done this since... WAAAY back before Oliver had even decided on where he was going.

SO.

I'm gonna do it, following in Dotty's example.

How's My Driving?

honest critique as to how I'm playing my Original Characters (In addition to any and all of my Canons from the canon games I'm in) would be greatly appreciated ;')

OC's are:

worldresolution

Oliver Malcolm @ seun
Victoria Reynolds @ papermagic
Ba Lin Yao @ bousek
Cecilia Leone @ traceyourheart

keybladewars

Leila @ balancingdark
Noxi @ brightestnight

deviant_uni

Oliver Malcolm @ falseregret
Victoria Reynolds @ papergirl
Noxi Aurella @ shestillshines
Rebecca Cooper @ brandmysoul

I am a leaf on the wind, watch me be a genius;

2006-04-15T01:45:55Z

ALRIGHT.

Work was lame, but what else is new. What's not lame, however?

I had the bestest idea EVER.

well, okay not really. But it's still an excellent idea.

Now, first, a bit of backstory.

Yuzu and Tet had pitched the idea of incorperating worldresolution characters into omgwtf_high, so we'd have a chance to play them in a less stressful setting, see how they'd react if they weren't constantly on the brink of facing certain demise.

For various reasons, I really wasn't OVERLY keen on this idea, although it was VERY tempting.

Tonight, after Yuzu sent me some icons from the latest Supernatural episode, I came up with an ingenious idea.

Or, well. It was a stupid idea when I first thought of it. But rather than just blurting it out I kept it to myself, went to dinner, and by the time I'd finished I had cultivated it into a Damn Good idea.

NOW.

Backstory over.

Here's the pitch.

First of all, this will be an All Orginal Character Game. While some obscure characters might slip through the cracks, I will kick someone if they try to apply for Sephiroth or for Jean Grey, or whatever.

This is a BRAINBUNNIES game.

Now.

In this world, (Which will basically be an AU version of our own world, since I don't want to complete a totally new freaking world) People have special abilities. They're born with them, they manifest over time.

It's become grudgingly accepted, although it's not widely liked.

There exists a school (Yes, I know this is ripped off of X-men. IT'S OCS, OKAY? FUCKOFF.) a University that takes in students from the age of thirteen on up and trains them how to harness and control their powers, in addition to everyday boring old highschool/college stuff.

This school...doesn't have a name yet, I'm working on it.

But basically, it's a school for freaks. There are basic rules (No using powers off-campus, no using powers in dorms, yadda yadda.)

But rules are always made to be broken, and really, who's gonna know if the telekinetic floats shit to her from down the hall?

It's a school for superheroes and freaks and whatever you want to call them. There are teachers, and students, and parents, and so on.

And the school is probably in New York or something. I don't know. Metropolis? ahaha no.

ANYWAY.

This is an idea I definately want to persue. And it'd be a place where, if we so chose, our WR characters would have an AU to not be total outcasts and function on a (semi)normal level.

And for those of us who are losing, or have lost characters, it'd be a place to keep them alive.

Unless of course they did something they shouldn't in This Game and died.

PLUS, it'd be a place for new characters and stuff. I know I've got a few ideas already that really don't fit anywhere else but would rock here.

SO.

Questions/imputs/flames?

Also, I'll be making this public, so feel free to link people to it if they'd be interested.

I am a leaf on the wind, watch me be boooored;

2006-01-14T14:51:08Z

I should do this for the rest of my WR and KBW characters, but I'm bored and feel like doing it for Claire right now.

fandom; tripletriad
what; 20 26 Random Facts
who; Claire Redfield [hundrednations]

Claire grew up around guns, and in addition to owning more than a few of her own weapons she has experience with most of which a Police officer is trained with.
She was a tomboy for as long as she can remember, and always had more boy friends than girl friends.
One of her ways of showing affection is by causing physical pain. This explains why Leon quite frequently gets hit.
Claire sleeps with a gun under her pillow, because of what happened when she was twenty.EDIT; She no longer does this, because Leon now shares her bed, and she feels inherently safe when he's with her.
She can't stand straight coffee, and always asks for the cup to be filled only halfway, so she can douse the rest of it in sugar and milk.
She lost her virginity to her first boyfriend, at 18. She keeps this information carefully hidden from Chris, even though she never had sex after that.
Despite Claire's casual attitude, she takes physical intamacy very seriously, and if she has 'relations' with anyone, it's very important to her.
Claire spent two years at the local university with an undecided major, before dropping out. She doubts she'll ever bother going back.
She always sleeps with a light on somewhere in her room, ever since the incident with Alfred. She panics when the power goes out, because it means she can't see if someone decides to attack her.
She's a light sleeper, and always sleeps with a pair of slip-on shoes right next to her bed, just in case she has to suddenly make a run for it.
She was always attracted to Leon, but she wasn't aware she was in love with him, until he started distancing himself from her after in his words he'd 'almost killed her.' It still hurts her that he won't let go of that.
Claire is a borderline alcoholic, something that wasn't a problem for her, really, until after the 'incident.' She started drinking whenever she had nightmares about what happened, and has sort of kept up the habit. She claims she's a social drinker, and doesn't always drink just to get drunk, but she's partially just fooling herself.
Claire roomed with a Japanese girl who worked in her father's sushi bar for her two years in College. As a result, while she can't cook most things to save her life, she makes excellent sushi.
Claire is a motorcycle enthusiast, and much prefers riding her bike to driving a car. In fact, she hates driving, and only does it when she needs to get more than herself and someone else places, or when it's too cold to ride her bike.
While she's still very much a tomboy, Claire's got a secret passion for cute underwear. She's got a mix of sensible undergarments, in addition to cutesy things with cartoon characters, and a few things that could be considered 'sexy.'
Claire tries really hard to be the best mom she can to Sherry, but she feels kind of like she's fighting a losing battle. Sometimes she realizes that Sherry's turning out a lot like she was, and wonders if her mom felt as frustrated about her.
She pretends she's more badass than she actually is. She's prone to flailing, and is embarassed easily.
She was a girl scout up until her Senior year in high school. She dropped out after her mom died.
her favorite color is dark pink, although she'd never admit it.
Claire's best friend is Rinoa Heartilly, and has been ever since they first met. Leon is a very close second, however.
Claire hates how she and her brother have grown distant, but she doesn't know how to approach him about it, and knows he's too stubborn to approach her.
Smokers piss her off, and if people light up in the bar she'll walk over and put the cigarette out. When she's working, the bar is a 'no-smoking zone.'
Claire loves it when Leon runs his fingers through her hair. She's been intentionally leaving it down more often in hopes he'll start playing with it while they're sitting together watching a movie or something.
For the first time in her life, Claire is actually thinking about someday being married and having children that she doesn't accidentally come into due to being entrusted by dying parents.
Claire complains about Leon's stubble, but secretly kind of likes it.
Claire doesn't like the gangs, mostly because her father died because of their constant bickering. She's also petrified that Leon and Chris will meet the same fate.

WILL FINISH THIS WHEN I GET HOME FROM WORK

I am a leaf on the wind, watch me steal shit;

2006-01-09T23:05:36Z

okay, so I'm expanding this to all my active games... except KBW, since it just started. And KW. Since it ALSO just started.

So. alexandria_high, worldresolution, tripletriad,

How's my driving?

worldresolution
Oliver Malcolm [x]
Victoria Reynolds [x]
Ba Lin Yao [x]
Yatouji Satsuki [x]

tripletriad
Claire Redfield [x]
Ada Wong [x]
Lucia Cortez [x]
Tseng Kurogane [x]
Mokoto Kusanagi [x]
Winry Rockbell [x]
Sango Mayuki [x]
Brock Stone [x]
Anju Sage [x]

alexandria_high
Yuna Phillips [x]
Quistis Trepe [x]
Ellone Loire [x]
Miyu Hattori [x]
Fratley O'Grady [x]
Tseng Kurogane [x]